Life is busy but God is good!

My youngest hot doggin' it!

It’s been awhile since I have posted, my apologies.  When school starts back I will be more faithful to weekly posts, but right now, life is busy!

We spent the 4th with family-eating, skiiing, wake boarding and playing cards, but most of all being thankful for the freedoms we enjoy as Americans each day we live our lives.  I have been challenged through a recent “kick you booty” real estate class through Keller Williams to journal 5 things I’m thankful for each day.  While I consider myself a positive person, your perspective changes when you actually write down your blessings!

While the Bold class is helping me do what great agents do, God is showing me how faithful He is everyday!  Recently while studying Titus 1, he showed me a simple truth and branded it in my mind.  Titus 1:2 says “God, who cannot lie…” I knew His character and that he doesn’t lie but never before had he shown me that truth in black and white.

God cannot lie!  He can’t lie.  Do you know another person who cannot lie?  I don’t- The really cool thing is all the promises He has made and we, through this scripture can know they are all trustworthy.  Never a flood like Noah experienced, never leave us, never forsake us, always provide for us-even more than for the birds!  They get juicy worms, we love juicy steaks! 

Take a few minutes to recall other promises that are God’s word and write down your blessings everyday!  The old hymn “Count your blessings, name them one by one..” really isn’t a bad thing for us to do just so we can realize how faithful and trustworth our God is for us.

So when life is busy, remember God is good!

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The Prince who Understands his Princess

Last time I blogged, I left you with a verse to memorize.  It was:

“Be strong, do not fear;
your God will come,
he will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution
he will come to save you.”  Isa 35:4

I hope you are claiming the Be strong and fear not part daily.  I know I am.  As I have been reflecting on this verse, another part really struck me.  Our God will come…to save us!  I love that idea of being saved.  Not in a Savior way, but in a damsel way.  Let’s see if I can explain.

For those of you who know me, you know that I live in a house full of boys, males, men!? Sometimes!  My boys range in age from 46 to  10 – the latter being our West Highland Terrier, who, yes, is a male too!  With all this testosterone around here it’s sometimes a little hard to get your inner princess needs met.  

They love Gamecock baseball, action movies, lifting weights and lots of other real man stuff and while I have come to enjoy much of these things to, sometimes I just want to be a girl! You know the whole fairy tale thing-rags to riches-Cinderella, even the princess in Braveheart! As a guy you can’t understand this part of us, but if you could for just a minute try to “get it” you might be surprised at your rewards.

You see deep in all of us women is this little girl who really does love being beautiful.  Dresses, make up, jewelry, and having our hair done by someone else…it’s just the little things we do because deep down we all really are that three-year old little girl who loves to have tea with her friends or her big strong daddy.  Why? because deep down we want to see and feel those adoring eyes that are captivated by the things we say, the cookies we made or just because we are yours! Now I know you haven’t ever been a little girl, but if you have had a little girl or seen a little girl twirl in a dress and say, “Look at me!” You can “get it” just a little.  We just want you to notice us and be blown away by us, what we do, what we don’t do… Every now and then a little statement of “Wow!” or “you are so good at ___” It helps us know you see us and adore us.

But what’s so cool about our God, ladies is that even when our husbands don’t get it, He does!  Isaiah 35:4 says “He will come and save us.”  He knows our inner hearts! He knows that we were made for romance, to be pursued and He wants us to join Him on His adventure so he can unveil our beauty.

But here’s the big “AhHa!” we have to recognize we need Him.  Ask for His help to “save us.”  I believe there are lots of us who don’t want to be needy or incompetent and what we do by being super woman is deprive our God and husbands from their roles in our lives.  We stand in the way of fully experiencing the deep love and emotional relationship we could have because “we can do it!” “we got this!”

God gives us more of what we need emotionally when we are willing to “need” our husbands.  We need to ask for help-around the house, with the kids, and emotionally.  They don’t just “get it” and part of our princess role is to help them see practical ways they can be our white knight’s or warriors.

So how will you Be strong and Fear not today?

How will you allow God to come and save you?

Will you notice when your emotions go from 0 to 10 and identify the fear? or will you look for ways that you can be vulnerable with your husband so he can be your prince?  My prayer is that in your weakness you will see our God is strong!  I love you all and am so desperate for God to make me more like the princess Tonya He wants.  I hope you will grow and learn with me as we do life together.

“Be _______, do not ______;
your _____ will come,
he will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution
he will come to ______ you.”  Isa 35:4

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OCD Project and Christians!?

While flipping through channels recently, I found this show on VH1 entitled the OCD Project.  I was intrigued by the title and description so I set it to record.  Luckily it was the beginning of the  series so I was able to meet the participants and learn about the various obsessions, fears and rituals.  I have been captivated each week as I watch this very talented Psychologist, Dr. David Tolin, expose their fears and help them begin to overcome them.

As the weeks have passed God has really been speaking to me through this show! Weird, I know.  I am not a hand washer, a worrier or a ritualistic person.  I am fairly clean, healthy and balanced where germs and bad thoughts are concerned so this blog is not about me proclaiming I am OCD in the psychological sense BUT in a spiritual sense I am.  God has been revealing to me areas of my life that are like theirs. 

For example, one participant lost her father in a car crash and now she is compulsive/panicky while driving.  She checks and re-checks because of her fear of hitting someone while driving.  Another lost her boyfriend to cancer and now worries incessantly that her son will contract cancer and thinks that by doing repetitive motions, she protects him.  As strange as they sound, as a Christian, I find my fears coming into my daily life.  I want so desperately for my children to know and grow in the Lord that what is squeezed out of me in tough times is ugly, unloving bossyiness, rather than the patient, loving mother I want to be.  Or this selfish wife who’s to tired to muster up some encouraging words for my husband. Fear is “False Evidence Appearing Real.”  That’s what overpowers people with OCD-Fear!  That’s also what Satan uses to overpower us and keep us from “throwing off every hinderance that so easily entangles us. Hebrews 12:1

What are you afraid of?  Really? When you loose your cool, yell or storm out of the room-What are you afraid of?  Is is that your children will make mistakes? or is it that your spouse won’t listen and value you and your opinions? or is it that you are fearful that your sibling will continue the alcoholic tendencies your father exhibited and later you lost your family unit over?  Every time I go from 0 to 10 on the emotional level I ask? What am I afraid of? When I can figure that out I can hand it over to God, our sovereign Lord, who wants to be our Abba Father.  He wants us to cry on His shoulder and let him help us not be afraid because He’s here.

The sooner we learn we can’t control it all, the sooner we will live with a sliver of eternal peace in knowing our Daddy is omniscient-all powerful.  Capable. Protecting. Mighty.  Won’t you take the OCD challenge with me?  Let’s record together when we feel ourselves go from 0 to 10! When we are anxious, angry, mad, scared.  Write the moment down and then reflect and ask God to reveal what you are afraid of and ask you to trust Him.  Let’s also memorize this verse,say to those with fearful hearts,
       “Be strong, do not fear;
       your God will come,
       he will come with vengeance;
       with divine retribution
       he will come to save you.”  Isa 35:4

“Be strong, Do not fear!” friends…Our God will come to save us!  He is our warrior, protector and saviour.  Our husbands can’t be all that, as much as they try and want to be there for us.  I love you all and hope my heart’s cries touch yours on some level as we seek to grow and be more like Christ, raising up a quiver full of Godly servants.



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My not-so-perfect Life!

Welcome friends to my very first post!  I was approached a year or so ago about helping others be the spouses and parents they should be in Christ.  My first response was, Ha!  You must be crazy!  Fifteen years ago I knew a lot and could teach you everything in the world about how to be a Christian, Godly wife, and fabulous Christian mom…now!  No way!  You see, I was in a low spot…a horrible, negative, hopeless place.  My marriage was unfullfilling, I felt God had abandoned our “deal” and my children were growing up, and to my chagrin, didn’t need me like they used to need me. 

Moses words in Chapters 3 and 4 of Exodus were very similar to mine.  “Lord, who am I?  I don’t have it all together!  This must be a cruel joke, cause I know less now than ever!” and I also said, “What if I don’t have anything worthwhile for them to hear?  I’m not the person for this…my boys aren’t even grown yet!  They could still fall off the deep end during high school.”  I was full of excuses why God couldn’t be calling me to do this “Big Thing” for Him.

So for over a year God has continued to draw me closer to Himself, show me who He is, and do an unspeakable miricle in my life, Jay’s life, our marriage and in our home.  While I don’t know how or what to do to help others in this journey, I felt a blog would be a way I could regularly share the nuggets God is teaching me.  I hope this will be a source of encouragement and stretching for you.  You can know that God Himself is highlighting what will be shared on this screen as Tonya is truly a sideline player just typing what He wants you to hear as you, like me, strive to live in abudance!

Psalm 7710 And I said, “This is my fate;
  the Most High has turned his hand against me.”
11 But then I recall all you have done, O LORD;
  I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago.
12 They are constantly in my thoughts.
  I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works.13 O God, your ways are holy.
  Is there any god as mighty as you?
14 You are the God of great wonders!
  You demonstrate your awesome power among the nations.

This passage is what God shared with me this week as I prayed about writing for the first time.  God showed himself faithful to Moses and the Israelites, to David ~ a man after God’s own heart, and to me as I struggled to believe God is who He says He is.  This passage encourages us, when we don’t see God to recall how he has been faithful to you.  In verse 11, he “recalls” all that you have done.  Trust right now that God is Holy.  His thoughts and plan for your life is always about what’s good for you.  Even when it feels so stinking awful, trust His heart.  I didn’t.  I doubted.  I questioned.  But I can assure you if you will pour your heart out to Him, He will show up! He cares for us friend.

I have so much more to share with you about this life long journey I am experiencing.  Please take a minute to share your thoughts, hopes and questions.  You just never know how God will use your heart to bring someone else into relationship with Him.  God has called me to this place for now and I am trusting it is “He works all things together for good to those love Him and are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28

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